Don’t Sweat the Small Stuff… and it’s all small stuff
Richard Carlson, Hyperion (1996)

For weeks, a friend kept suggesting that I read this book and I finally relented today — and I am glad I checked it out from the library instead of buying it.

I am utterly boggled as to how this terrible book became a best-seller.  I appreciate the meaning and message, but it was so thin in actual content that it left me feeling cheated and annoyed.  The book is nothing more than a list of 100 generic positive affirmations stretched out over 200+ pages and it ends up being trite and repetitive.  Frankly, there is more valuable advice on the side of Starbucks cups.

Each chapter is barely a page long and contains just a bit of dull anedoctal evidence to support the theme.  To add to the misery, you will find yourself experiencing déjà vu every few chapters as you read essentially the same thing Carlson wrote a few pages back.

Don’t Sweat the Small Stuff is just a terribly simple book geared at weak people who lack so much confidence that they can’t even tell they’re being scammed as they read it.

This is the same theme I’ve had for a while, though I did make a few changes.  The hard coding was made by these dudes and they deserve all the credit:

Dreamworks Redux theme developed by Blog Design Blog

I only futzed around with some of the images in Photoshop, so please give props to Vinh Le.  He did all the CSS and XHTML.

After 30 months at mywaves, I got laid off on Friday.  In less than three months, I’ve lost:

- A good friend and bassist in Dino Scoppettone.
- The band I’ve called my musical family for 4 years, Mirror Image.
- My job at mywaves.

Part of me wants to load up my 1993 Corolla and drive it up an interstate and start a new life wherever I decide to stop or wherever my trusty Corolla decides to take a rest.  Another part of me wants to weep like a cold puppy trapped in a rainstorm, but that just won’t be productive.

Instead, I’m going to write about 5 songs that never cease to make me feel better. These are songs that I always look for on my iPod when I’m feeling down.  I’ve included an audio sample and a short description of why each song has made an impact on me.

Shaking Like A Flame by Glossary – For What I Don’t Become (2006, Undertow Music)
iTunes Link

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I discovered this song in the SXSW 2007 Showcasing Artists sampler and was immediately hooked.  Not only is it well produced; it’s catchy, and also well written.  The “twanginess” is quite contagious and, as a drummer, I must always drum along to the country train drumbeat.

This song had played through my head many times, but the chorus suddenly hit me like a ton of bricks as I drove to Los Gatos on my way to run the creek trails.  Since then, the chorus has been sort of a gospel to me and I must listen to it regularly.  No other song has so easily and powerfully described how I want to live my life.

Chorus:
But never again
Will I let my life
Slip through my hand
Without holding on
Never again
Will I blame anyone
But myself
For what I don’t become

This song also elicits a bit of a bittersweet emotion in me because it’s the first one I listened to once I finally composed myself enough after learning that Dino passed on. I’d also be remiss if I didn’t mention that guitarist Todd Beene responded to my short e-mail I sent the band that tragic night.

Mistakes We Knew We Were Making by Straylight Run – Straylight Run (2004, Victory Records)
iTunes Link

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When I worked for DRUM! Magazine, I made less than $30K but I enjoyed it and always knew bigger things were ahead.  Our editor kept a big box of CDs that had been reviewed or rejected and he would occasionally let us sift through it and take CDs home.  I took this particular CD home because I thought the name and cover art was interesting.  At that time, I would’ve have never bet that this CD would be in my regular rotation years later.

Usually, the chorus tends to be the earworm of a song.  In this case, the end of this song’s first two verses is what caught my ear:

Verse 1:
And all our sins,
Come back to haunt us in the end,
To hang around and tap us on the shoulder,
And smile silent,
It’s all implied,
You’ll die trying to live this down,
You might as well forget it,
Still I’m convinced,
Wondering what if is the worst thing there is,

Verse 2:
And all these lines fall short of what I had in mind,
A failed attempt to capsulate a feeling,
So I just try,
Fail and try and try again,
Someday I swear I’m going to get it,
Because I’m convinced that giving in is the worst thing there is,

Sure, this song may be a bit emo but it’s hard to argue with the message conveyed in just a few lines.  Failing is not necessarily a bad thing if you make an attempt to succeed.  Every one of us can point to an opportunity we wish we hadn’t passed up and it hurts thinking about what may have been.  We should stop focusing on what may have been and start focusing on what could be.

Matroshka by dredg – Catch Without Arms (2005, Interscope Records)
iTunes link

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This is yet another band I discovered while working at DRUM! Magazine.  I also had the chance to interview and write an article about their drummer, Dino Campanella.  Even more, I got to see their 6/18/05 show at the Catalyst in Santa Cruz, CA from stage right.  Thanks in part to this album, dredg is a national act I’ll always think of them as a superstar local act.  They cut their teeth at any and all Bay Area venues and I run into Dino Campanella occasionally when I’m on my way to the Los Gatos trails.

Chorus:
Look another year went by,
They keep passing by,
But damn I didn’t even die,
To hold it so I’ve grown,
I fought time but lost

“Matroshka” closes Catch Without Arms and is a bit of a departure from the other songs in the album.  This is a song that I probably don’t fully understand but the basic message I can gather is that I need to realize that time is running out regardless of how young I feel.

I Am by Train – Train (1998, Aware Records)
iTunes Link

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I was a big fan of Train until they succumbed to the grasp of record labels execs and started releasing vomit-inducing radio singles.  I digress, though, and must admit that I am a huge fan of their earlier work.  This song can be related to by just about anyone.

Chorus:
Am I the son I think I am?
Am I the friend I think I am?
Am I the man I think I wanna be?

Verse 2:
I never had a day where money didn’t get in my way
I never listened to much Elvis
I can’t remember a warm December

This song makes reflect on the relationships I’ve formed along the way.  Accordingly, it also makes me reflect on the relationships that I’ve ruined along the way.

I grew up dirt poor, raised by a custodian and a housewife who briefly enjoyed a full-time job as a pastry chef before being sidelined by multiple myeloma.  I often think about how my parents feel about me and whether or not they’re happy with how I’m living my life.  They follow very traditional Mexican beliefs and, according to those, I should definitely be married with children by now.

This song makes me feel human and it grants me a bit of a release from life’s pressures.  I will always make mistakes and worry about what I’m doing, but so does everyone else.  That’s what makes us human and that’s why it’s fun to meet people and form relationships.  Things may not always work out, but the experiences will last forever.

Solsbury Hill by Peter Gabriel – Peter Gabriel (1977, Atco Records)
iTunes Link

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For nearly 6 years, this song has been my anthem.  Granted, it has fallen to the back of my mind often, but this will always be my theme song.  Shortly after leaving Genesis, Peter Gabriel wrote this song, which details his worry about the future.  He left a cash cow to try to build his own empire and he ultimately succeeded.

The entire song strikes me like no other song has struck me, and I simply cannot pick out a specific part to talk about.  If I win a prestigious award one day, the lyrics to this song will probably be my acceptance speech.

I just hope I can look back one day and have a moment like Peter Gabriel had when he wrote this song.  Maybe that moment will be this very blog post.  Who knows?